Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Phrases reloaded!!

'Phrases' (my earlier blog) was one of the experiments that I always wanted to try out.They say "never change a winning team(till it loses)",so me will take a chance again.

CRICKET:

1)Sunil Gavaskar-- Partiality is my motto in life..Tendulkar rocks!!
2)Ravi Shastri-- Show me the money,babeh..
3)Sachin Tendulkar(SRT)--Legend..Drop me for the finals of each tournament,I never play when my team needs me.
4)Sourav Ganguly-- Great leader,impartial..Plays to the gallery and is a great actor too.. :)
5)Rahul Dravid--Probably India's greatest batsman ever. I can't captain for nuts..Who was supposed to bowl the 31st over Mr.Chappell,tel me fast.. And yes he is way better than SRT..
6)Ajit Agarkar--Definition of liability..Dont waste a bullet on him.
7)Harbhajan Singh--These days the only flight in my vocabulary is Cathay Pacific,British Airways and Lufthansa..Flighting the ball anyone??
8)Anil Kumble-- India's greatest test match bowler..Has a circle named after him on the distinguished MG Road in that great land..What else does one want?? Huh..
9)Ricky Ponting--I am sick and tired of winning world cups. But I will win 1 more..
10)Muttaih Muralitharan--Chucker..Great chucker by the way..
11)Shane Warne--The game's greatest slow bowler ever.
12)Brian Lara--More talented than SRT..Better?? NO..Not as consistent..Finals excluded :)
13)Greg Chappell-- Great as a player..Horrible as coach...Disgusting psychopath with priorities in the wrong place.. Sucked even as coach of South Australia..
14)Shahid Afridi-- If he is 27,Pakistan is bigger than India, in size..
15)Maninder Singh--Now I know why u were always hyper active..Cocaine,Ganja et al huh??
16)Bishan Singh Bedi-- I dont care a rat's a%# on what u have to say on people and cricket...U are a disgusting,arrogant,filthy moron..

TENNIS:

1)Pete Sampras-- Greatest player I have ever seen though he wasn't exactly a genius on clay..Fought vs amazing contemporaries..It was genius vs men not genius vs the boys as in (2)
2)Roger Federer-- More talented than pete..But not better..Huffs and puffs in a five setter cos he hasnt seen many against these children..
3)Andre Agassi-- Superb player..Was born in the Sampras era..Despite his bravura feats wil always be Mr Steffi Graf and that's sheerly out of respect for Steffi..
4)Williams sisters--Power play..Slam bang...Is this the ladies game at all??
5)Richard Williams(their dad)--Nut case..
6)Maria Sharapova--Oomph and substance..Package deal..
7)Paes-Bhupathi--A potentially great combination that went awfully awry..Shame that egos took precedence over country..Indian sport's darkest chapter..

CRICKET ON TV:

1)Harsha Bhogle-- Great knowledge..Yours truly owes a lot to one of his articles in the Sportstar in April 1998..Awe inspiring writer...
2)Charu Sharma-- Super TV person..Wil be unabashed in praise of this chap..But one suggestion.."Be bold da..We know u wanna flirt with Mandira".. :)
3)Mandira Bedi--Actual cricketing lingo from a lady is truly refreshing..Has come a long way looks wise from the gawky young lady in DDLJ..
4)Ruby Bhatia-- Is my make up ok?? By the way who is the captain of this team??
5)Kris Srikkanth--Macha speak in tamil..I can understand..

POLITICOS PART2:

1)HD Kumaraswamy--No english me..Only kannada..Me son of Devegowda..
2)Chandrababu Naidu-- Hyderabad is the hen that lays the golden eggs.. Rest can wait..
3)SM Krishna- Bangalore..
4)APJ Abdul Kalam--Finally someone whom we can(or wil it be could??) call President..Hats off Kalam sahab.
5)Jawaharlal Nehru--Flirt..Actually a lot more than that..Lady Mountbatten anyone??Unfortunately his name is the second that pops up when we talk abt freedom fighters..Gandhi,Nehru blah blah...Bhagat Singh,Patel,Tilak,Azad anyone??
6)MGR,Rajiv Gandhi-- A disgrace to the coveted Bharat Ratna..Puhleezzz..Gimme a break...
7)NTR-- 2 rupees a kilo rice mythologically...
8)Sardar Patel--India's nearly,very nearly man..Might have been the boost we needed early on..
9)MK Gandhi--Epitome of simple living..Is he a mahatma?? Thats debatable.
10)Bhagat Singh-- Forgotten hero..A martyr in the truest sense of the word.. I salute the man..
11)Toady,Sycophant,Servile flatterer,Boot licker--Rajiv Shukla..
12)Jagmohan Dalmiya-- Kaam bhi bahut achhi tarah karoonga aur jhol jhaal bhi..

Will keep options open for the third part of the trilogy..Cheers :)

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Phrases..

As I started thinking and pondering and wondering abt the topic for my next blog,got a gut feel that I should try something entirely different,instead of the routine run of the mill articles that people churn out day in and day out and expect people to comment.This one might fall flat on the face or hit the jackpot..I am prepared to gamble this time.. :)

Coming back to the topic,I thought why not describe many of the celebrities that I know in a sentence or less...It could either be a first impression or the first thing that comes to your mind when u think of these people...I wil cover desi celebs this time...

Here goes:

POLITICIANS (Political leader is an utter misnomer..I dont believe in that phrase)
1) Dr.Manmohan Singh-- Man of integrity.. Economist par excellence..A thinker..PM??? nah...
2)Atal Behari Vajpayee-- Along with LB Shastri,one of the few politicians(call him a leader,I am fine with that) I doff my hat off to.
3)LK Advani-- Hardliner...Dude take a chill pill...We are all Indians for God's sake...
4)Laloo Yadav-- Joker....Entertainer..
5)Sonia Gandhi-- A Mrs..G in the making..
6)Jayalalithaa-- Dictator...Period
7)Karunanidhi--This is my last election..
8)Pramod Mahajan,Rajesh Pilot,Madhav Rao Scindia,Ranga Kumaramangalam-- India's future..Sadly curbed by cruel twists of fate..
9)Praveen Togadia--Need such people to counter Karan Thapar and Prabhu Chawla..
10)Dharam Singh-- Who is he?
11)HD Devegowda-- Ex PM..No qualification needed for the post...

TV WORLD:
1)Prannoy Roy-- God of indian news..Pro. Never searching for a word...
2)Rajdeep Sardesai-- A dynamic Prannoy...Great for TV
3)Barkha Dutt-- Hype (she is good but she aint no saviour)
4)Nidhi Razdan-- Sexy..
5)Vishnu Som --Stop flirting with Nidhi mate...She is married :)
6)Prabhu Chawla-- Dude u suck...
7)Karan Thapar-- I know to make people cry..Ask Kapil Dev Nikhanj..If this guy has to be punished, ask him questions til he cries..
8)Ram Jethmalani-- Side effects of BP
9)Aaj tak-- Breaking news that breaks out every minute
10)Udaya TV-- Change the channel

FILM WORLD:
1)Amitabh Bachhan- Indian cinema's greatest actor.ever...If not him then who..Tel me .
2)SRK--Wil do anything for cash..Super actor when director is at the helm(read Swades)..
When jokers direct him,he plays SRK on screen as well..:)
3)Aamir Khan-- Hindi cinema's version of Kamal sir...Not as good yet but may get there one day.
4)Karan Johar-Something's seriously wrong...Stick to TV..U aint no director..
5)Dr Rajkumar-- Biggest influence in Kannada cinema..LEGEND
6)Raghavendra Rajkumar-- Biggest mistake of Kannada cinema
7)Shankar Nag-- Maestro of Malgudi..
8)Anant Nag-- Truly great entertainer..
9)Rajnikanth-- Superstar..Leave ur brains at home..
10)Kamal Hassan-- Genius..In the top 5 actors ever in indian cinema
11)Paresh Rawal-- The definition of the word actor is him..
12)Om puri-- Great voice..Greater actor.
13)Vidya Balan-Ethereal beauty
14)Rakhi Sawant-- No comments..This is a family blog..:)
15)AR Rahman-- Flawed genius. Too much of hype..We need more Roobaroo's macha not the Rukhi Sukhi rotis .
16)Sonu Nigam--Mimic par excellence...
17)Aishwarya Rai-- U settled down finally..Aunty..:)

This is a precursor....More coming up in the next blog...:)